4.24.2012

Well hello there, my little friend

Ahh, my summer paramour. My beloved. My Romeo. By now, if you have been with me for a while, you know that when the weather warms up, the snakes come out. And I know, I know they are coming. I expect them. I walk out the front door assuming I will see one. I look right, left, and right again before I ever step foot out of the house. But still, every time I see one, my stomach sinks into my knees. My body does that physical "shudder" thing. It's just so jarring to see a vapid thing in my space. My home turf. Where my kids play. 

I swear. I think they are wooing me. I'm pretty sure I saw a wink from one today.

This one, to be exact.

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First snake of the season. I hate snakes. I've yet to come across anyone who doesn't. I've begged and pleaded with my husband to get us the hell outta here and move us somewhere, anywhere, where these serpents don't try and hunt us down. But today? Today I got a little sad when my husband smashed him into the ground with a broom handle. I genuinely said to him, "do we really have to kill him? Can't we just like, throw him back into the sage?"

Not sure what it is exactly, but I'm getting a little...shall we say fond of my yearly friends. I've been in this house eight years now, and even though the initial shock of seeing them makes me feel like I'm having a heart attack, I kind of...like them.

I feel a bond forming.

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Of course, that bond only happens when they are dead, when I can pick them up and touch their nasty slimy scaly skin. When I can look closely at their fangs that they would be more than willing to sink into my flesh given the chance.

I hate snakes.

Looks like someone else has the same "bond" that I do with them.

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And then he took it inside to show dad.

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Like I said once before, momma ain't raising no pussy.

Oh, I also received this text from my sister last night...

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My family. I swear.

Of course, I will try a bite of rattlesnake.

You know, for blog purposes.


33 comments:

  1. I am getting shudders just reading about these snakes and looking at the pictures! I would die if I saw one nearly every day! Yikes! You are much braver than I!!!:)

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  2. I bought a Von Dutch hat like 10 years ago, when I saw my girl Britney wear one. I think I only wore it once lol. Sshh! Don't tell anyone. Haha

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  3. Oh my gosh Raven, I LOVE the hubs expression on his face when being shown the snake! Freaking amazing.
    I have been watching everywhere I walk now that I know those SOB's like to live on our property due to the horror story last Summer. Your one badass mo fo seeing them every freaking day!

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  4. I just got chills from seeing those snakes, you are faaar braver than me!! And a much better sister!!

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  5. I cringe just thinking about seeing snakes ever let alone every day...I would die, seriously! I wouldn't even be able to hold a dead one....shivers, ewwww! You are one brave mama but then again I guess you are pretty used to it after being there for 8 years.

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  6. Eck I could NOT deal with seeing snakes as often as you do :-)

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  7. His FACE in that picture of him bringing that snake inside... PRICELESS. Lol

    Ewww!

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  8. My Husband is deathly afraid of snakes. If I see one, I just calmly get the heck away...hubby definitely screams like a girl and runs away like a girl...haha...

    We had Summer for like a month here, and now Winter is back, so I'm wondering if it'll kill of some of the snakes? I had read where they were coming out earlier this year because we had an early Spring and Summer and then all of the sudden BAM 40 degrees outside, not lying.

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  9. I literally just picked my feet up from underneath my desk while reading this post! Uhhh, snakes make me cringe! I've heard of fried rattlesnake bites.. not sure if I'd ever be able to try them though.. good luck :)

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  10. I hate them. Ever since a few weeks back finding that small rattlesnake in our yard, I'm at a panic. I mean, we have snakes... a lot of them, everywhere. But in my yard? YIKES! I'm totally freaked out. I can't imagine seeing that snake you posted yesterday around. I think it would ruin me.

    My husband will eat anything.... even snake. If he has killed it, he's tried it.

    Welll... not armadillo. THAT'S a different story.

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  11. PS. Your husbands facial expression is priceless when little man brought him the snake.. baaahhaha!

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  12. I am so glad we don't have rattle snakes here, or at least I've never come across one. We have harmless, but stinky, gardner snakes.
    I don't mind snakes too much, it's the spiders that get me!

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  13. eeek!! you're touching it???? i think you're my hero. seriously i'm shuddering reading this and had to scroll to the bottom so I really have no clue what your post about snakes was about!

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  14. I tried rattlesnake before and it tastes good! Not really "just like chicken" but pretty close! The texture is just tough lol!! You'll have to try it!

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  15. Ewww I dont think I could handle finding snakes all the time, The one time a snake jumped in the pool with me at my parents house I nearly had a heart attack... and that was a small non poisonous one!



    http://espressocookie.blogspot.com/

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  16. Eww. Snakes are scary and yucky.

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  17. Blehhh. It made my stomach get all knotty just looking at those pictures of the snakes!

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  18. I cringed when I saw these pics on instagram! Ughh snakes are the worst! And kudos to you for holding one....I don't even think I would've gotten that close to take a picture. But your babies do look so cute holding them :)

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  19. hell to the no. I hate snakes.

    I would be sad killing them though too. But not if they got too close.

    I never went in my backyard in virginia in the summer we had copperheads or some crap there and lucky me had a stream in my backyard. They were everywhere. yikes!

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  20. Seriously - RaeRae - PUT UP A WARNING FIRST. Jesus. I almost pooped my pants. And the only thing I hate more than snakes is poop in my pants.

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  21. Yuck! My mom is deathly afraid of them...so my bro bought a fake one and put it in the microwave for her to find. HA!

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  22. I'm sure i'm your only reader who LOVES snakes! LOVE them! And, from the pics you posted, the one your little guy has in his hand is just a corn/rat snake and actually eats other snakes, even poisonous ones.

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  23. Disgusting. I HATE snakes. Hate them.

    We were sitting on the patio on Saturday night and there were spiders crawling around and then I woke up from a dead sleep, turned on the light because I swear I SAW one in our room. It was just a dream but once you start seeing them, they are everywhere.

    I love the pic of presenting the snake to your husband. Too funny.

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  24. Definitely not a fan of snakes...

    I'm a new follower via Christina from Christina's Pop Life.

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  25. You are too fierce Raven!!! Snakes!!

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  26. FYI i have cooked a rattle snake before and it doesnt taste all that bad, but its alot of work for a little amount of food and its super chewy chicken taste.

    thought you should know

    BGR

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  27. I've been following the instagram/twitter von dutch hat dispute and get a good laugh! I'm not a fan of ed hardy OR Van dutch but if anyone could rock it, it is you! :)

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  28. You are one brave lady! I don't do snakes.

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  29. I hate snakes. Not sure why I even read this post because now I feel a little sick! Yes, snakes make me physically ill!

    And are those really rattle snakes? I hope we don't get them in the part of washington I'm living in! YUCK!

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