2.12.2013

This Is How You Know You're Country

after getting thrown from the sled


Country people trek over to their neighbor's house in the snow, and throw their two year old on the sled, and laugh hysterically when that two year old gets thrown ten feet on a super steep curve.

Then those country people come back to our house, and we have a big ol' bonfire. In which we sit in our summer beach Tommy Bahama chairs.

Rob calls this one "his domain"

Which made me think...what makes someone "country?"

And then I came up with this...

You know you're country if:

- You tinfoil your kids' rooms. I've talked about this a few times here on le blog, but tinfoiling my kids' rooms has been one of the best decisions I've ever made to date. Like, ever. Seriously, my kids are amazing sleepers. Probably because they can't tell if it's day or night but still...amazing sleepers nonetheless.

- Your kids are always naked. Always.
yes, even on the country club golf course. No pants. What rules?

- You measure a fabulous night out by finding your weave tangled into your sequin top in the morning. That would mean it was goodtimes, obviously.

- You dress up your beer.
a reinbeer. snort.

And finally, you know you're country if:

- Your child takes his toys to school in a Crown Royal bag.

What? 

It's convenient.

40 comments

  1. everything. i love everything about this post.

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  2. We kept our toys in a crown royal bag too. It's a useful bag.... And currently we have one that's a cat toy as well. I think my cat's an alcoholic.

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  3. When I was growing up, my mom had a bunch of crown royal bags laying around too. I used them to keep my toys in there, school supplies and one time my snacks for school...

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  4. this may also be- you know if you're awesome if. Because all these things make me like you more.

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  5. Wish I had snow. Looks like fun. My Blog

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  6. I remember my Dad doing that to my brother's windows when he was younger and the crown royal bags, those always made the best for carrying around Barbie accessories!

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  7. Covering my windows in foil was the best thing I ever did in college and Crown Royal bags made the best Barbie sleeping bags!

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  8. I remember using those Crown Royal bags to put all my change in as a kid. I had three and so did my brother and sister. Yeah, my Dad really liked Crown Royal. Thanks for making me laugh!
    -K

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  9. You would fit right in here in SC! The sledding looks like fun! And I love blackout shades, foil is a great idea.

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  10. haha! I just love you! The weave and sequin top has happened to all of us 1-2 or 50 times... lol

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  11. Oh my god, yes! Naked kids, check. Weave hanging out all over the bathroom, check. Eating McFlurry's in my sweatpants on a Saturday night, check. Going to an RV show, check. Good lord, I'm a country girl (and I love me some country music!)

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  12. Have you seen Buckwild on MTV? Its so awful its good! Your fourwheeling in the snow is something they would do!

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  13. Not "country", Raven - REDNECK. Yes, those things, especially the tin foil and the naked kids (pretty silly looking, btw) - NECK LA ROUGE. :0

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    1. I love how you always call me by my name, TazLady. Turns me on.

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    2. You're so silly. Did I say there was anything wrong with redneck? I still love you! ;)

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    3. As I you, Taz. Can I call you Taz?

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    4. Abso-freakin-lutely.

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  14. That's just how country is! We like to have a good time, we don't always care what it looks like while we are having fun! I used to put my make-up in Crown Royal bags! In high school I carried one as a purse once. Once, because it was taken by the principal.

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  15. As an Arkansan, I can appreciate all of this. Especially the nekkidness and tin-foil windows. My room at my granny's house was like a crack den, all dark and mysterious.

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  16. Hahah love this. Definitely country mouse.

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  17. haha- I love this! I grew up in a super rural area, and I miss it now that we're in the suburbs. At my high school, TONS of students drove their tractors to school. We even had a dedicated parking area for the tractors, I kid you not. Also- our biggest fundraiser of the year? Cow Dump. People buy 'plots' on the field, like a bingo board. After a high school football game, they let a bunch of cows out on the field- when one poops in a square- that person with that plot wins money.

    Wow- I'm embarrassed I just typed all of that ;)

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    1. Hahaha Erin that's awesome. Your high school sounds way cooler than mine ;)

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    2. Grew up in a rural area also, I fully understand the driving tractors to school. I wish we had done something like the cow dump haha. That is one of the funniest things I've ever heard of!

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  18. Love LOVE this. I love that your boys are always naked! They just have a cutest little dimple bums :)

    I miss you and I love you and I will come see you soon I PROMISE.

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  19. All of this is true, because I know by experience!!! Thank you for the big giggle today ;))))
    Cortne

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  20. LOL...this reminds me of an episode of Buckwild (yes I watch/love it)....only they were using a trash can lid....and there wasn't snow. Looks like a blast for real! And your fire pit is ridiculous - love it!!! Here's the link: http://www.mtv.com/videos/misc/876768/buckwild-trashcan-surfing-rewind.jhtml#id=1700768. Oh, and naked babies are adorable!

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  21. I can't. this is just too good.

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  22. I have told far too many people the story of how your kid takes his toys to school in a Crown bag.
    Usually the story comes out when I'm drinking Crown. And a lot of it.
    So, I guess thanks for the material.

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  23. Oh I'm all over this one! You know you're country when you can sunbathe topless in your yard because you have no neighbors! Yep, do it all the time!

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  24. Ha! This is high-larious. Also, you kind of look like you're about to "Superman that Ho" in the pic of you in the sled. :)

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  25. Hahahaha! I definitely store my child's toys in Crown Royal bags.

    Sorry I'm not sorry.

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  26. This post makes me so happy! I grew up in a super rural area so everything about this makes me think of home. Hope you had a happy Tuesday!

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  27. hahaha I love this! And I am so jealous of your fire pit! Ours is a small fire bowl of shame compared to yours.

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  28. I tin foiled my own window during my first pregnancy. I couldn't take the sun coming in! I just took it down after 5 years since this momma is done! But I do miss my complete darkness sometimes. Our beautiful arched window does look much better from the road without the foil though. :)
    Hailey @ Love, Laughter and Lipstick

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  29. You got me with the hair!!!! That's my indicator of a great night out too. Just stumbled upon your blog. Hi from Australia!

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  30. I want to go sledding! I have never been. Well, we used trashcan lids once, but I want the real thing!

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  31. haha, you are hilarious! you and i could be total country bumpkin bffs in real life i bet (:

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