You know, this is the song that never ends, it goes on and on my friend or something. Except replace the word song with sickness and there you have it.
The above is currently what my bedroom looks like. In case you missed it, I have been diagnosed with strep throat and also one super incredible sinus infection. Colt baby has had the nastiest of I don't even know what but it's bad. He's been sleeping in my bed with me every night as every twenty minutes or so we have to blow half his body weight from his poor raw nose. His eyes are sunken, he looks like a baseball bat made direct contact with his face and that bed above? We have not left it since Sunday, except for one doctor visit and one cough drop run.
Of course, when one child gets to sleep in mommy's bed, the other must also, or life as he knows it is over. No way was I sleeping with both kids in my bed, I may have a California King but I have it for a reason…and dat be space. So I dragged a mattress from upstairs and we have been sleeping over like the ultra modern Babysitters Club.
Oh and. The doctor prescribed me antibiotics and also threw in some pain pills for the initial pain of razor blades being stuffed down my throat. I took the recommended dosage and it made me violently ill. Do you even know what it feels like to dry heave consistently over a toilet when you have strep throat? I kid you not, it lasted for hours. My throat was so raw and so sore and so razor-bladey I legit wanted to die. And it's so weird, because those pain pills? I used to take them for fun back in the day. Such a huge disappointment, when I really need them.
You know how when one person in the house gets sick, everyone in the house gets sick? That's usually how it pans out for us too, except Gunner seemed to be dodging "the sickness" this time. Until last night, when he woke up in a startle around 2 am:
Gunner: mom! I can't see!
Me: Gunner, go back to bed. I'm right here.
Gunner: seriously I can't see!!
Me: Damnit Gunner you can't see because it's dark and the middle of the night and you better go back to bed right now or you will wake up your sick brother and I will paddle you!
I didn't hear from him again until a few hours later:
Gunner: (this time whimpering a little) mommy I really can't see…
Me: For the love. (Turning on the lamp by my bed)
And then…well and then I noticed that his eyes were swollen shut. I mean, he literally could not open them. They were crusted and red and just…stuck shut.
Talk about mother of the year I am.
I felt horrible. I mean, I can only imagine, he wakes up in the middle of the night, can't see and here I am, his mother, the one person he is supposed to be able to trust with his life, wondering why he can't open his eyes and I yell at him to go back to bed or else.
I mean, now I can laugh about it, and I do, but I still feel horrible.
The other thing? Since having strep throat, I can't talk above a normal tone. Which means I can't yell. Which means my kids haven't heard a thing I've said all week.
But the best thing. The best thing is Rob has been out of town all week. Since Sunday. He left the day everyone started going downhill. He comes home tonight, in which we are all for the most part on the mend. He wasn't here during the bazillion middle of the night meltdowns because one kid couldn't breath and one couldn't open his eyes (shame on me). He wasn't here when I was hunched over the toilet in more pain than child bearing and he wasn't here for all the snot and the throw up and the whines and the cries and the misery and the complete breakdown of this household.
And he will mosey on in tonight and be all, "so, what did you do all week? Obviously you didn't clean the house."
And then he dies.
ok so I totally lied. The very best part is obviously the
5 pounds I lost due to the sickness. What better, more organic
way to jumpstart that summer get bikini ready plan?