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3.06.2014
via my wisdom pinterest board

You're damned if you do and damned if you don't, right?

One second, you can be on top of the world. Everyone singing your praises. The next, you make one little lapse in judgement and those same people are even more eager to burn you at the stake. You succeed, they cheer. You fail, well, they usually cheer even louder. 

That's just life. It's going to happen no matter what kind of person you are. Good, bad, Britney Spears... no one is immune. I've been accused of a lot of things, but delusional I have not. Negative? Pessimistic? More than I'd like to admit. However, I still stand by to this day that I am a realist. I don't sugarcoat, won't pretend and most definitely solemnly swear from this day forth to not give a f*ck about the bullshit. If that makes me negative and pessimistic, then by all means, burn me a Scarlet Letter. 

Because two things:

1. Consider your source. You get praise? Wonderful. But consider your source. Hitler was praised by millions. You get lambasted? Consider your source. Hitler lambasted millions. 

2. Know yourself. In my blogging career, let alone my life, I've been praised and accused of many things. People have said I'm an "inspiration, an amazing mother, ballsy and gutsy and brave," and as much as I appreciate these comments, I know the people saying these things don't really know the real me, all they know is what I present, when the truth is I have the exact same problems and issues that they have. Yes, I may speak my mind and do so with conviction, but I don't let the "praise" get to my head because I know who I really am: someone who is flawed and definitely not foolproof.

On that same note, people have also commented that I'm a terrible mother, wife, and person. If I didn't know myself, these comments could very well get to me and ruin my day. But I do know myself, and so when I read things like this, they float straight into the abyss. These opinions hold no water. They mean nothing. 

Because let me tell you. When my two little boys wrap their arms around me and kiss me and hug me and tell me they love me fifty times a day? That means something. When my husband says to me "you know, sometimes I really can't stand you but I ultimately love you and will 'til the day I die," well, that right there means something. When my mom says I'm doing an amazing job of raising her grandsons…yeah, that pretty much means the world to me

So when some rando comments something nasty and negative on my blog/facebook/instagram/life/whatever, it's pretty easy for me to see it for what it really is: a worthless waste of human decency.

We all rise, we all fall. 

You will have an abundant audience for both.

Just always consider your source
and know yourself. 

(which is pretty much what I have figured out is the secret to happiness.)

13 comments:

  1. I love this post and totally agree. The other day I got my first negative comment and of course it was about my parenting. Because what is more appropriate thing to judge? As a new mom to a 2 month. Old I could have let it test me apart. I got pissed, wrote a nasty blog post that I never published, and moved on. I know what kind of mom I am. Everyone else can go scratch.

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  2. So this is something my husband and I needed after last night. We've (especially him) have busted our ass for a local business helping them. He posted something on facebook that got a lot of people up in arms and so those people we've been doing this work for pretty much got gruff with him about it. I've never even met the person who I think threw the fit, but he's a preacher and the facebook thing (on my husband's personal wall but he tagged people to their personal wall, not anywhere associated with the business wall) had the word fucking in it and the guy threw an absolute hissy fit. So the owners of the shop are in Cozumel and they got a phone call down there... SERIOUSLY but anyway what you wrote makes perfect sense. OY :(

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  3. Well said. I think people need to stop letting such negative criticism get to them, simply by doing what you said. No one is perfect, we all make mistakes, and we all hopefully learn from it. At the same time, people should step up on their high horse just because someone threw a little praise their way.

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  4. I like this. You are pretty good at taking in the good and letting the bad roll off you! =) =) can't wait to see my nieces this weekend!!! oops I mean nieces and nephews. ;)

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    1. Haha! The first was truth! ;)

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  5. There is such a difference with being negative and trying to have a discussion. I am open to discussions all day but once someone get rude, mean and disrespectful I'm pretty much done cause ain't no body got time fo' dat! I think people who intentionally go around leaving nasty comments at just unhappy people. We should pray for them lol

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  6. You're so right. There will always be people looking to bring others down! Gotta let it roll right off your shoulder!

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  7. Thank you for this, Raven. I couldn't agree with you more. It's like you took the words right out of my mouth. The ones that don't know themselves are the ones affected by the negativity. But guess what!? That's just someones opinion.. whoopitydoo. I'm glad you know yourself and don't let the bs get to you. We have the same IDGAF attitude and I wouldn't change it for the world.

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  8. Truth!!! Great post!

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  9. Such a wonderful and truthful post!!!

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  10. Everyone has good and bad qualities. Even the worst person on earth. But when you have a blog and get on your soapbox and claim to be one thing when you have shown over some time that you aren't that thing at all...you can get called out. But a blog is just a bs show, no one can take it all that seriously from either end.

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  11. Well said! Love you boo!

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