The Life Of A Blogger Child

10.08.2015

I started blogging when my oldest was eight months old. Of course, I started for the same reason everyone else did...to keep my friends and family up to date on my special little snowflake of a firstborn. He was super special and don't anyone ever forget it!

And then I had another and then I realized I wasn't the first and only mother to ever create life and many had come before me and many would come after and even though in my mind, my spawns are amazing and special and groovy, their 5th snotty nose of the week is probably only cute to me. (And let's be honest here - gag me.)

But then, more people than just my mom and sister started reading my blog and it seemed like overnight offers and freebies and sponsor-related opportunities came rolling in. And I have no shame in admitting I'll accept almost anything thrown my way. Give me all the freebies!

Anyway. With great power comes great responsibility, so I had to up my blogging game. Which meant I had to start taking lots of photo shoots. Of myself. With my little handheld camera on timer mode.

When you spell it out like that, it kinda seems a tad pathetic, doesn't it...

At any rate, I did it. I do it. I take photos of myself and then put them on my blog. And if you know anything at all about picture taking, you know you have to take upwards of 60 or so in one sitting just to get a good shot. Hey, I don't make the rules, nor did I give myself a very unfortunate nose that only looks good from very specific angles. (Thanks for that Good Shepherd, by the way.)

I usually take my self-inflicted photoshoots outside. The lighting is better, there is prettier scenery and my youngest is almost always outside playing, so I don't feel like I'm out there all by myself which makes me feel a little less pitiful. And if a neighbor drives by or walks outside to water their lawn and happens to look over at me, I can just act like I'm being an involved mother taking photos of her little boy at play.

As if.

Anyhow, after I would take my photos, I would go inside, load my SD card onto my computer and start the painful process of choosing which perfectly curated picture would make the majority of readers think I had a supreme, perfect life. (Didn't you know? Bloggers are so much better than you.)

The first time I noticed it, I chuckled to myself a little and kept scrolling through, obviously thinking, "ew, that's not a very flattering photo." What am I referring to? As I mentioned earlier, my youngest is almost always outside playing. I figured he would just continue playing and not even really notice my stellar example of how not to be a raging narcissist by taking hundreds of selfies.

Except I think he totally notices...


and notices...


and notices...


and then it starts getting pretty ridiculous...


the window, really? And to think I thought he was safely inside watching Tom & Jerry.


and just when you think he's nowhere in sight...


Oh there he is.


I realize by showing all these photo bombing outtakes that I am also showing some terrible photos of myself that never made the carefully crafted blog world cut, but I'm here for more than just the free booze and chunky scarves (ok not really) but I did think it would be nice of me to put a little PSA out there for those of you fellow bloggers who have little kids running around and/or are thinking of joining the ranks...

Blogger kids:

they're always watching!

Oh and also, start saving up for their future therapy sessions.

They're gonna need 'em. 

16 comments:

  1. haha that's awesome! I had no idea Colt was such an awesome photobomber!

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  2. Umm...you left out THE BEST (& worst!) one of all!!

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  3. too freaking cute.. the window face was the best. loved this post!!!

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  4. Oh my goodness, this is such a funny post. I'm laughing out loud at my desk. My favorite is the one of him in the window!

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  5. I LOVE everything about this post!

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  6. Hi Raven! I'm interested in sponsoring a post! :)

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  7. hahahahahaha classic! Photobomb king! :)

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  8. Your son has mastered the art of photobombing! This is too funny!

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  9. hahaha this is the best post I have read in a long time. Cracked me up!

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