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Don't Quote The Raven

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9.24.2014
^^BYE FELICIA BYE^^

"It doesn't feel like falling. It feels like flying."

That's what they all tell you when you are contemplating skydiving.

And right about now is when I would like to call bullshit.

Sure. After you get your bearings straight and even out a bit, it feels like flying. Which is an amazing feeling. But the very second you exit the plane? The very second you are no longer sitting inside something concrete and are instead out in the open? 

It feels exactly like what you are doing…which is falling towards the earth at 160 MPH.

I closed my eyes. I knew I shouldn't have, but I did. I closed my eyes and didn't open them until that "heart coming straight out of your throat" feeling passed. But when I did, when I opened my eyes and looked around…well gosh damn friends…it was amazing.

Being so high up, looking down, knowing I just fell straight out of an airplane for fun…was incredible.

And I've heard it before, how skydivers say the most amazing sound is the sound of nothing…and then I heard it. 

Silence. Complete silence. Not the air, not the breeze, not the sounds of what it sounds like 10,000 feet up in the sky…but complete and utter silence. It was like being in a sound machine where there was nothing to hear. And it was amazing.

And then came the flying. After the initial falling, and it was, in every sense of the word, falling, came the sensation of being wild and free and gliding across the sky. I know it sounds cliche, but as I love to say, cliche's are cliche's for a reason.

It was exceptional. One of the best experiences of my life. And one that I want to experience over and over and over again. In fact, I would love to one day get my certification to skydive solo, where I'm in control of where I go and how I get there.

Go big or go home. Ain't that what they tell us?


I'd love to thank Malibu Rum and their
"Best Summer Ever" campaign for the opportunity
to do something so amazing!
9.23.2014
^^Dangerous Minds soundtrack on the way up. Represent!^^

When I got approached by Malibu Rum about participating in their "Best Summer Ever" campaign, I initially said no. I was busy having too much fun this summer and just the thought of adding even more amazing funness to my already busy schedule of fun overwhelmed me just a tad. 

Who are we kidding. Malibu Rum? And an awesome opportunity to check something I've always wanted to do off my bucket list? Not just yes, but hell yes. And let me tell you something…even though I haven't written out on paper my top ten bucket list activities, I always knew skydiving was at the very tippy top. It's something I've always wanted to do and have never second guessed, and participating in this campaign and having the opportunity the do exactly that, to say I was ecstatic is a pretty big understatement.

I've always been a bit of a thrill seeker. A thrill seeker, shall we say, with a bit of a condition, and that condition being I'm happy and willing to do crazy risky activities if the chance of things going wrong greatly result in probable death. For example: I won't cliff jump off the highest point into the river because chances are, if something goes wrong, I won't die. Instead, I will break a limb or pop a boob or become paralyzed and getting badly hurt isn't something I want to volunteer for. 

However, with an activity like skydiving, if something goes wrong? Chances are more likely I will just splat and go fast before I even know what hit me. Which is totally okay with me, since I don't have a fear of dying. A fear of dying a slow and agonizing death? Yes. A fear of going fast doing something exhilarating? Not one bit. 

(I guess now would be a good time to tell my friends and family that, just in case, I want a blowout for my funeral. I want not one sad song played, instead, I want everyone to rock out to Britney Spears and take shots of fireball. Not even joking, I want to be remembered with a party!)

So anyway, I asked my sister if she wanted to skydive with me. It took her no time at all to agree and then our cousin Terra decided to come with. We met up halfway and seriously laughed the entire time during the four hour drive. When you get three girls in a car together, on their way to jump out of a place, and getting a break from a combined six young kids, madness is bound to happen. (And seriously, if you can't recite all the words on the Dangerous Minds soundtrack, you have lost at life.)

And honestly? I can truthfully say I wasn't nervous one bit. Not even a tiny bit of jitters or butterflies, that is, until that very second I was sitting on the edge of an airplane 10,000 feet in the air, feet dangling over the side and knowing my only way down was to fall…

…straight towards the Earth below.

Stay tuned tomorrow for the action shots, you know, the really attractive ones where your skin is flapping in the breeze and I almost vomited my heart straight out of my throat. 


A super special thanks to Malibu Rum and their
this amazing opportunity!
9.22.2014

I'm not sure why, but lately, as happens occasionally, I've been doing a little soul searching.

It might be the abundance of reality trash tv I've been watching, which makes me feel so incredibly good about myself, or it could be my sudden jump back into the country station on Pandora which has caused me to reevaluate every single aspect of my life such as why am I not day-drinking whisky nor throwing empty beer cans at all my jilted exes?

Both of which I am more than happy (and willing) to do, by the way.

Still. I got a little touchy-feely with my blog last night, and sort of word vomited a bunch of funny stuff when it comes to my thoughts about myself. Because, let's all be honest here. As much as we like to preach "I'm so not into myself and don't want to talk about myself and don't want to draw attention to myself," the number one reason most people have a blog is so they can specifically talk about themselves and draw attention to themselves. 

And yes, be totally into themselves. (And if you say you aren't, you're a liar. And probably a shitty blogger.)

Anyway, as much of my life goes, I heard a specific line of a country song the other day and thought to myself "omg, that would make for such an amazing blog post."

What was the line, you ask?

It came from none other than a song called Chicken Fried by the Zac Brown Band. 

It's funny how it's the little things in life
That mean the most
Not where you live or what you drive
Or the price tag on your clothes
There's no dollar sign on peace of mind
This I've come to know...

"There's no dollar sign on peace of mind."

And then they all said? Amen.

Peace of mind. Three little words that stuck out to me and said more than a sixty chapter novel.

There may be a lot I don't know, but when it comes to myself? I can be pretty sure when I state the following:

- I'm a damn good mom. My kids get books read and mouths fed, swings swung and hearts loved. Tents, forts, trampoline jumping and a whole lot of kissing. Not much is left for the weary when it comes to the smothering I give those monsters. Whether they like it or not, they have it coming.

- I'm a semi-decent wife. Definitely not perfect and most surely not ideal. I have a lot to learn and even more to grasp. I don't have it all figured out, probably still won't in ten years, but I'm here and willing and hopeful. And that's enough.

- I will always accept an apology. No matter what the offense, if the apology is sincere, the slate is wiped clean in my mind. No need to rehash or bring up the past, if you mean it, so do I.

- I'm not a rule follower. I always have, and always will, believe that rules are meant to be broken. This doesn't mean that if you are a rule follower we can't be friends, it just means you won't be privy to the most amazing parts of my life. And let me tell you, they are amazing.

- I know me, so I don't care if you don't. One of my strongest traits (in my never to be humble opinion) is that I really, honestly, no really really don't care what you think. It's hard to get my goat. I don't give that power away. You can prick and prod all you want, but in the end, it's you who is worn out. I don't use up all my energy trying to prove myself. Because I know I don't have to.

- I balance my own checkbook. Flaw is my middle name. Perfect is my kryptonite. I revel in and thrive on the fact that I'm human. Just like you.

- I'll be a good friend. There is lots to learn in life, but one thing for certain we all learn eventually is who our real friends are. In the words of the ever so wise Helen Keller, "I would rather walk with a friend in the dark, than alone in the light." Preach.

- I really, really, reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeallllllly like vodka. I do. Can't, won't, don't wanna hide it. I guess now is where I say you're either in or you're out. In sickness or top shelf. In good times and in bad (and by bad, I mean Smirnoff at the worst. None of that Monarch BS).

No really. 

'Til Grey Goose do us part.