When I wrote a little blurb in this post about my mom almost leaving me in San Diego, stranded and alone, with no way home, all because of one big misunderstanding with a rented jet-ski, an overwhelming amount of you wondered about my moms account, and begged me to have her guest post. Ok, so maybe only one person asked (thanks Kelsey!) however, I did, and she came through!
Quick backstory: a few years ago (like 15) my mom and I went on a vacation to San Diego, just her and I, over the 4th of July. One warm sunny day we decided to rent jet-skis and take them out on the ocean. Mine was busted. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
However my mom has another "version" of exactly what transpired that almost caused her to leave me deserted thousands of miles away from home.
Below, in my momma's own words... (with a few tidbits from me peppered in, written in blue)
Let's just start where Raven left off. I was justified in leaving Raven alone stranded in San Diego for this reason alone:
The man that rented us the jet skis told us in no uncertain terms that if we took the jet skis "over by that island" that we would get stuck in sea moss and DIE. Plus we would still be responsible for paying for the jet ski. I love how she says we would still be responsible to pay for the jet skis if we were dead.
Needless to say, little Miss "don't quote the Raven" headed right over in that direction. Lies! She will tell you that she "accidentally" drifted over that way by mistake, but no, her jet ski pipe got clogged with that clumpy sea moss and it almost burned out the engine. Black smoke was spewing out of that jet ski like you wouldn't believe! Now she was really adrift, couldn't get it started again, and I am deciding how to pay for this $5,000 machine!
After all, this vacation was being done on a shoestring budget, or so I thought. Imagine my surprise when we checked out of the hotel and I got our room bill...and realized that Raven was already a day drinker! Did I tell you this trip occurred when she was 16? 16 and a half. AND A HALF!
Anyway, back to the jet skis. Foxy little miss met foxy little mister stranded out by...you guessed it...THAT island. Mister got off his jet ski, swam over to her amidst all that gunk (yes readers, Raven really is "that " hot oh my gosh I'm embarrassed -- even at 16 -- and BB*), stuck his arm down that pipe, pulled out all the moss, pushed her while swimming in it, until her jet ski was clear of it all, it started up again, and she headed back to shore.
We turned the jet skis back in and waited to see if we would get our deposit back, and what kind of damage Raven had done. Seriously? I got a lemon!
Can you say C-O-M-P-L-E-T-E OVERHAUL? Can you say "Raven, find your own way home?" I don't know, can you say child abuse?
A few other things you may not know:
Raven is my first born. And her favorite. She always promised her two innocent younger sisters a trip to Disneyland if they would do what she said. They believed her and they did it! For years! I think she owes them that trip -- all expenses paid. Ha! No.
I wear glasses and Raven would always tap on them while I had them on until I threatened her that if she did it one more time, I would take her out! So, she started coming toward me with her fingers curled, fractions on inches away from my glasses and says "what if I do, mom, what if I do?" Well, she did, and I took her out! Her dad came home just in time to save her, with a "what the *$&% are you two doing now?!" This one is true. Now that I have two boys that drive me insane sometimes, I feel really, really bad. I'm sowwy momma.
But...every cloud has a silver lining.
Raven is the only person who will go to a scary movie with me.
Raven drinks duckfarts with me.
Raven goes wine tasting with me.
Raven never comes to my house empty handed...she always has her rum and diet coke. Good one mom.
Raven is an awesome daughter. I am proud of her (yes, a round peg that will never fit in a square hole), she is an amazing mommy and her boys simply adore her! She will always be their best friend (oh my...just thinking of Raven's two daughter-in-laws! Please God don't let them marry a Democrat), she does discipline them, but they are hard and fast buds! They are her life and she has fun with them. They are so lucky! *blushing*
Actually with Raven, her cloud has a gold lining...in the shape of a heart.
She really can be a blast to travel with...we laugh a lot! And I would go back to San Diego again any day with her. Me too mom, as long as you are paying!
I love her. AND YOU CAN QUOTE THAT!
* before boobs